March 22, 2006. Tuesday.

I can’t understand why men binge-drink. They’d drink hard liquor, throw up, and then have a hangover for two days. Do other men do this or is it just H and his friend RoughRaider?

It’s been almost three months since I had the bladder infection and realized that H might have given it to me. All my resentments to him all these years came coming back to me. I was ready to leave him but of course it’s not practical to do that since I don’t really think that I could afford it financially. Besides, I don’t want my kids to go through it emotionally. I’m still mad at him, though not as intense like it was during the first couple of months. I think I’m falling out of love. I couldn’t stand the sight of him. I’m avoiding being in the same room with him. I haven’t slept with him since the infection. I don’t know if I still can or for how long I’d feel this way.